So.....Feb. 6 will mark 2 years since Brian passed away. Holy crap! So hard to believe it's been almost 2 years!!!!! I've been thinking about him some lately. Mostly looking at the kids and so sad that they won't know him and just knowing how proud he'd be of them.... :) I had coffee with a good friend of mine last Saturday and we were talking and she knows a lot of the baggage I walked away with after being married to him and I think that made for quite a jaded view of Brian. I started talking about some of the happier times and positive things he did and she was glad to have some positive feedback on him as well.....anyway, as a result of that convo, I started thinking about the difference in marriages and it became quite clear to me that in Brian, I lost my best friend and in Ben I found a true love. My love with Ben is so much deeper....I loved Brian also, but it wasn't the same. Ben and I have our differences and struggles, but the love is deep. Anyway, God's always in control......that's been more than proven in my life. It may not make sense now, but some day it will......
Jack has now peed in the potty 3 times in the last week. He's proven he's more than capable of doing so, it's just a matter of us getting him on there at the right time. I'm hoping he gets the hang of it soon so we can save some money on diapers!!!!
Cassidy needs your prayers.....as do we. She's sick a lot.....I mean a lot! Long story short, in addition to her always being sick, she told Ben the other day that she has a bump behind her ear, which she'd been keeping from us. The significance of this is that her Mom's cancer issues started out with that very thing and her pediatrician has already told Ben that with Cassidy's genetic make up, she has a 60% greater chance of following in her Mom's footsteps than the other 2 girls. This just isn't a good sign. Ben's making her an appt. for the doctor, but I know he's scared to death, as am I. Cassidy's a major hypocondriac (sp?) and she's well aware of her Mom's history, etc, so she's freaked out too. Just hoping and praying it's nothing.....
All the other kiddos are doing well.....keeping us busy!
Ben hasn't gotten another job yet. He regrets quitting the paper route, but I don't regret it at all. He was miserable and it wasn't a good situation. So, prayers for a new job, would be appreciated though! :)
Love to all my journal friends.....
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2 comments:
Wow. I can't believe it has been two years either! I am sure sometimes it feels just like yesterday and others like more than 2 years. It is pretty cool to see how God has worked in your life in those 2 years though...from an outsider looking in! And the kids will know Brian through you and everyone who is able to share him with them....and they have a great step-dad who really understands how to relate to them. That is very cool.
I would be freaking out about Cassidy too! Hopefully it just turns out to be nothing, but checking it out is a good idea. Sometimes I am quick to ignore things if I think that I don't really want to know what it is...but that isn't the right answer eiter!
Sometimes (a lot of the times), I just wish I could be a kid again and not have to deal with grown-up problems! HA! Where did that come from??!?!
So, I miss you! Good to "read" about you, but we should get together soon!
Love ya and will certainly be thinking about you on Sunday!!!
Thinking about you! (Even if it takes me for stinking ever to get over to your blog...)
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